5 Ways to Stay Motivated Through Relationship Challenges

Ifeoma Thompson, Relationship Coach, OTR/L, MAPAC

Whether you’re struggling with a new relationship or an older one, it helps to find the motivation to keep going. It’s not always easy to see your love for each other when you’re experiencing serious challenges. However, a healthy, fulfilling relationship is worth striving for.

Try these strategies to keep yourself motivated through challenging times with your partner: 

  1. Figure out your “why.” Why are you with your partner? Why are you still together and hanging on? Every relationship has an answer to this question. It’s crucial that you figure out your why and focus on it.
    • You may be together because you started off as close friends, because you’re deeply in love and have passion, or because of children or other obligations.
    • When you determine your why, it will help you rekindle your romance and figure out unique ways to overcome your challenges. 

2.Remember the past. Sometimes it helps to look back on the past and see why you fell in love in the first place. 

  • Your relationship will change over time as you evolve. However, remembering the past will help you figure out if it’s worth staying together. You may be able to go back and restore some of the initial emotions. The past can help motivate you in the present.
    3.Seek a solution. When you’re facing any difficulty, it’s easy to fall into despair and see the challenge as impossible to overcome. 
    • If you avoid viewing your relationship issues as impossible to solve, your mind will naturally start to search for solutions. You may suddenly find the answers around you as you look at other couples, watch motivational speakers, or read books. 
    • The key is to focus on finding a solution, rather than on how difficult and impossible the challenge is. 
    • Remind yourself that every relationship has a starting point and a middle point. You may be at the middle point with multiple challenges, but you can get past them and stay motivated to resolve your issues.
  • 4.Stay connected to your partner. One of the worst things you can do during a relationship struggle is to ignore your partner. This will make the issues worse and could destroy your love. Even if you need some space, avoid pushing your partner completely out of the picture. Ask this simple question as frequently as possible ‘Are You OK? “ And mean it.
    Whether it’s a daily meal together or a conversation late at night, it’s crucial that you continue to communicate with each other.
    • Your efforts to stay connected may involve talking to your partner, getting outside advice from TRUSTED friends or family members, and getting therapy or couples counseling.
  • 5.Find a reason to stay together. Sometimes you simply need a reason to keep your relationship going.  
    • The reasons can include your children, pets, household, career, and other things that you have built together. The reasons can also be more subtle, such as you love seeing your partner smile, or you love the way they compliment your cooking.

  • Whatever the reason may be, make it the center of your focus. It doesn’t have to be a monumental or enormous reason. It simply has to matter to you. 

Your relationship doesn’t have to end because of challenges. Instead, find a way to overcome the obstacles and restore your love. These strategies can help!


Talk soon!

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